In this post, I’m sharing with you 3 common signs of self-sabotage. I’ll share how you might be holding yourself back from living a satisfying life and using your fullest potential.
Let’s dive in!
What sometimes can happen is that we think that someone else doesn’t want us to succeed or that other people might be holding us back.
We might blame our parents, partner, kids, or our boss for where we are in our lives. But that’s the easy way out; blaming others instead of taking the responsibility in our own hands.
But what about self-sabotage? What about all the different ways we keep ourselves stuck?
No one else. Just our own patterns that are not serving us and are sabotaging our own success and happiness.
Let’s talk about that.
>> Prefer audio format? This post is also uploaded as an episode on my podcast, The La Ivana Podcast. Listen to episode 98: 3 Signs You’re Sabotaging Yourself And Holding Yourself Back here & subscribe to The La Ivana Podcast so that you don’t miss future episodes.
3 signs of self-sabotage:
1) you overthink your decisions and spend more time suffering in the indecision phase than doing the thing
Do you sometimes wait for the right time or the right way to do something?
We often overthink all the different scenarios and stay stuck in indecision terrified we’ll make a wrong choice.
If you find yourself worrying about what-if worst-case scenarios and not making any decision out of fear of making a wrong one – that’s one of the signs of self-sabotage.
While you’re not making a decision, you’re staying stuck in the indecision phase.
Of course you want to make an informed decision and you want to make sure you make the right choice. But it’s important to notice if you’re spending more time suffering in indecision than taking any action.
For many things, even if you make a decision you later don’t end up enjoying, you can make a new one again.
For instance, if you’re struggling to figure out if you should start a blog or a podcast. You might already have pros and cons list, benefits and disadvantages of both, you’ve gathered information on both and you’re struggling with making a decision on what to choose.
Or if you’re struggling with what niche to choose for your blog or your new coaching business.
Those are kinds of decisions that you can make over and over again whenever you want. If you choose blogging and realize you don’t like it – just make a new decision tomorrow. Or a month from now.
If you choose relationship coaching and you realize you actually want to coach people on confidence, you can make that decision again whenever you want to.
Don’t spend too much time worrying about making the wrong decision that you forget to take action on them.
Related:
How to Overcome the Fear of Worst-Case Scenarios and Start Taking Risks in Your Life
2) you’re not following through with your plans and decisions
You say you’re going to do something, but you don’t. How many times has that happened to you?
You’re excited to do something, and when the time comes to actually do it, it’s like someone is pulling your sleeve and not letting you do the thing.
Or even if you’re not excited to do something. But you know that doing that is going to be beneficial for you in the long term.
For example, organizing your finances or having a difficult conversation with someone. A conversation that you need to have, but you’re more anxious than excited about it. Again, it’s like someone is pulling your sleeve and not letting you do the thing.
That ‘’someone’’ is oftentimes ourselves.
If this happens to you, if you’re not following through with your plans and decisions, and you choose the easy way, you choose your comfort zone and procrastinate with taking action, that’s one of the signs of self-sabotage and holding yourself back.
Read next:
3 Powerful Ways to Stay Committed to Your Goals
FREE WORKBOOK: 5 Steps to Get Back on Track Today
SAVE FOR LATER 🙂
3) you have a hard time saying no and setting boundaries
Do you feel guilty for putting yourself first? Do you sometimes say yes to things just because you don’t want to let someone down?
It seems like the easiest thing – always being available for others and always saying yes. We think that that way others are going to like us and we’ll avoid any conflicts.
But it’s actually one of the signs of self-sabotage. It holds you back from honoring yourself, acknowledging your own needs, and prioritizing yourself.
How many times have you put the desires of others above your own desires? Even in daily life for seemingly small things.
It all compounds over time. You say yes 10 times for small things, and gradually you’re becoming a person who is putting everyone else first.
Eventually, when someone asks you to do something that requires hours of your time or requires you to be available for a few days, you immediately say yes.
Because you’ve developed a habit of always being there for others and not even thinking about what you want and how you want to spend your time.
Read next:
8 Tips To Say No Without Feeling Guilty And Selfish
Self-sabotage is such an important topic that we need to talk about because it affects our entire life. It affects our confidence, how we feel about ourselves, our relationships… Everything.
It’s much more than just procrastination, perfectionism, or comparison.
Before you go, if you want to start empowering yourself on a daily basis, I’ve got something for you!
1) FREE: 70+ Journal Prompts to Create a Life You Love
2) FREE: 111 Powerful Affirmations to Build Confidence and Feel Empowered
Until the next time,
Ivana
I’m guilty of all of these. I’ve worked hard to get in front of my self-sabotaging behaviors and the work is paying off. But it takes time to reverse years of learned behaviors so I know I still have a ways to go. I’m excited to check out your journal prompts and affirmations! Thank you for sharing!
Overthinking is a BIG one more me!! Thanks so much for sharing this!!
Not following through is my biggest way of self sabotaging!! I find myself doing it all the time when I have new ideas. Since I’ve started noticing this in myself its easy to break that cycle.
Such a powerful post, thank you!