La Ivana Cert. Life Coach · The La Ivana Podcast

Fear is there to protect us. Without fear, we would get into all kinds of dangerous situations, putting our lives on the line without thinking of consequences. Fear of flying is no different. If you want to overcome fear of flying, you need to learn how to deal with that part of yourself that wants to keep you safe.

Fear of flying was my biggest fear my whole life. It was holding me back in various different ways. It was so strong that I chose a 30+ hour bus ride when a free flight was offered to me. I couldn’t even imagine myself flying on an airplane.

But, the more I traveled, the more it became obvious to me that in order to visit all the places on my bucket list, Australia included, I had to overcome my fear of flying.

At one point, overcoming my fear of flying was non-negotiable.

And, a few years ago, I overcame that fear. Now I love flying and I can’t wait to get on my next flight.

Until then, I’m here to share with you 10 mindset tips and action steps that helped me overcome fear of flying.

So let’s dive in.

1. Create a MUST statement to overcome fear of flying

“Scared is what you’re feeling. Brave is what you’re doing.”
― Emma Donoghue

As a life coach, I worked with many women all around the world to help them reach their goals. Whatever goal they wanted to achieve, I was there to help them achieve it.

One of the things I realized is that if your goal is not a MUST, you won’t take any action on it. You’re going to constantly postpone it, you won’t prioritize it, and you’ll have a hard time reaching your desired outcome.

Since you’re reading this post, I’ll take my liberty to assume your goal is to overcome fear of flying.

Now, let me ask you, why? Why is overcoming your fear of flying a must for you?

Not just why you’d like to overcome it, but why is it an absolute must?

Let’s be honest, we want a lot of things. But until we intentionally prioritize our goal (whatever that goal is), we won’t achieve it.

My goal to overcome fear of flying wasn’t a must until I fell in love with Australia. Yes, I’m the kind of person that falls in love with places. I haven’t set foot on Australian soil yet, but something has been pulling me towards the land Down Under for years.

Also, my astrocartography chart is confirming that I’d thrive there and I choose to take that as an undeniable fact.

The thing is that by having such a strong urge to go there, I created importance around my goal. My must statement was, ‘’I MUST overcome my fear of flying, OTHERWISE, I’ll never… (you can assume what would happen)’’

Similarly, if you live in Bulgaria, and your lifelong dream is to visit Vancouver one day, your must statement might look something like, ‘’I must overcome my fear of flying, otherwise, I’ll never visit Vancouver.’’

So what’s your must statement? Why is overcoming the fear of flying an absolute must for you, otherwise (what’s going to happen if you don’t overcome it)?

I found a way to go from southern Croatia to Amsterdam, Bucharest, Paris, etc. all by bus because it was possible to get there without facing my fear of flying.

But since I want to travel the world and it’s an important goal of mine, I realized that something needed to change.

I created an urgency and importance around overcoming my fear of flying.

2. Prepare anchoring thoughts before your flight

This tip is an action step, but when the time comes to actually apply it – it’s going to be one heck of a mindset work.

When you’re about to board your flight and right before the plane takes off, your mind is going to start going into negative thoughts. And that’s completely normal when you’re about to face your fear.

All those thoughts that start with, ‘’OMG, I can’t! I’m not ready for this. What if XYZ happens!’’ You know your thoughts around flying, so you can predict what thoughts are going to pop into your head when the time comes to face your fear.

In order to manage those thoughts filled with fear and anxiety, I suggest you prepare 3 to 5 (or maybe even more) encouraging thoughts that are going to be helpful in those moments.

Personally, I repeated ‘’Everything is going to be okay.’’ That was my main encouraging thought.

And I also repeated ‘’I trust that the pilot knows his job. So the same way I trust bus drivers and Uber drivers, I decide to trust pilots, as well.’’

I mean, when you think about it, it’s like we’re underestimating a pilot’s ability to do their job when we worry that things might go wrong.

Pilots go through a lot of training and they know what they’re doing. Remember that.

One more thing you could try to get out of the negative mindset is to think about what you want to do when you arrive at your destination. Bring focus to that instead of the negative thoughts.

Keep your list of anchoring thoughts in your jacket, in your wallet, in your notes on your phone, or somewhere else that’s going to be easy to access.

Don’t write that list and keep it at home or in your big suitcase.

Keep it on you at all times.

Free download:

111 Empowering Affirmations to Build Confidence and Improve Your Life

3. Neutralize fear of flying by doing a research

Before I got on my first flight, I watched a few videos on YouTube just to get more familiar with airplanes. The truth is that it’s easy to be afraid of things we’re not familiar with.

Once you learn a few things about airplanes and why they actually are the safest form of transport, you’ll calm that part of your brain that likes to panic and you’ll realize that your fear is actually irrational.

I say it’s irrational because nothing has happened yet and you’re worried about the future outcomes.

Your what-if scenarios are keeping you in fear and worry.

So, the action step for this tip is to spend 10-20 minutes doing research on flying and/or airplanes.

You can even write some facts that make you a bit more relieved on your list of anchoring thoughts.

Related:

EP48: Are You Living Your Worst-Case Scenario Right Now? + Journal Prompts for Taking Risks

EP45: Being Ready Is a Decision, Not a Feeling

 

4. Ask yourself what would it mean for you to overcome the fear of flying

“Don’t be afraid of your fears. They’re not there to scare you. They’re there to let you know that something is worth it.”
― C. JoyBell C.

This goal, like any other, needs to have a meaning behind it.

Why is it important for you to overcome fear of flying? Give it meaning.

For me, it meant that I could travel to Australia and other further places.

Gain awareness of what it would mean for you to overcome this fear.

Our fears limit us. Think about what kind of freedom you would gain once you overcome your fear.

For some people, it could mean that they’ll be able to visit their family more often. Maybe they’ll be able to finally travel to their dream destination. Or start taking steps to work as digital nomads.

We’re all different and I’m not here to tell you what meaning your goal should have.

But – it should be important to you. Otherwise, nothing is going to motivate you to give it your all and to face your fear.

SAVE FOR LATER 🙂

5. Start small with a shorter flight

My first flight was from southern Croatia to northern Croatia. It was a 30-minute flight in my home country.

There were a few things that made it easier, such as the fact that I understood everything at the airports and I could’ve easily asked for help because Croatian is my first language.

I made sure that I did whatever I could to make my first flight as enjoyable as possible.

And this is the advice I wanted to share with you, as well.

I mean, think about it.

If you choose your first flight to be one from Iceland to Greece, then you’d also have to deal with foreign languages, you wouldn’t know where to find all the information you need in case you encounter some issues, etc.

So in order to avoid all the unnecessary confusion, make it as simple and easy for yourself as you can.

6. Ask someone to join you on your first flight

This one was immensely helpful for me and it made a huge difference.

Before my first flight, I bought a plane ticket for someone I’m close with because I wanted to have someone I could rely on if things got too overwhelming.

Trust me, reader, I took this seriously.

Fear of flying is a huge fear for people that are struggling with it.

Most often it’s not something they’re just mildly uncomfortable with. No, I’m uncomfortable looking down from the 3rd floor in buildings.

But fear of flying is something much bigger. You feel your fear of flying with your whole body. You’re filled with panic, nervousness, anxiety. You understand what I’m talking about.

That’s why I recommend you go with someone you trust. Definitely not with someone who wants to drink all the free alcohol on the plane and is going to make fun of your fear.

Now I’m confident to fly alone and I absolutely love it. But having someone I could rely on during my first flight was an enormous advantage and it made our flight more fun.

7. Book a flight during the daytime (worked in my case)

Personally, seeing what’s happening through the window made me calmer.

When you’re flying during the night, you have no idea where you are and you can’t see anything.

Which, now that I’m saying this, could be just the right thing for some people.

If you want to be able to see what’s going on through the window – I mean, seeing at least when you’re taking off, sometimes seeing the ocean, or mountains – then, book a flight during daytime.

Getting to see everything could give you a sense of control, which is what I preferred.

If you feel you’d be better off at night not seeing anything, then booking a flight during night time might be a better option for you.

I understand how it can be beneficial, too.

You won’t be able to see where you are or how high in the sky you are, so that might give you a sense of peace, as well.

Again, this one is a personal preference.

 

8. Distract yourself during your flight

I’m all about being present in the moment, but when it comes to overcoming your fear of flying, being in the moment can sound scary.

Being in the moment left with your what-if worst-case scenarios? No, thank you.

I mean, being in the moment can also look like thinking that at that moment you’re okay and focusing on that.

Again, this is my undefined Ajna center seeing both perspectives.

However, more often than not, our fears and worries start coming to us when we take a moment to pause.

So, here are a couple of ways to distract yourself during your flight so that you don’t get stuck in your negative thoughts.

– take photos (when I booked my first flight, I made sure I had a window seat because, well… I always appreciate a good view. So if you’re in the window seat, take some photos or take a selfie to commemorate your moment of courage and facing your fear)

– bring your favorite book or a magazine

– bring some crossword puzzles (if you’re into crosswords)

– download some Netflix show and watch it on your laptop or on your phone

– journal your thoughts (free download: 70+ journal prompts to create a life you love)

– do a guided meditation (for confidence, dream life visualization, or something else to raise your vibration)

I love photography so, on my first flight, I distracted myself by taking photos. And, before my flight, I took screenshots of book blinks on the Blinkist app, so that I had the option to read a book if I wanted to.

Ultimately, just ask yourself what seems like a good idea to do to spend time during your flight and follow that.

It comes down to personal preferences for this one.

SAVE FOR LATER 🙂

 

9. Don’t try to overcome fear of flying. Instead, focus on learning how to deal with it.

This is a great mindset tip to apply for your fears and limiting beliefs.

Realistically, you don’t need to think about overcoming your fear of flying for the rest of your life. There is no need for you to overcome it completely.

Instead, I suggest you look at it from a perspective where you learn to deal with it.

That way, even if your fear pops up on your future flights, you’ll know how to deal with it.

The aim is not to overcome it completely. I mean, that could take years.

The goal is to not let your fear stop you.

My 2nd flight was from Croatia to Rome and I didn’t have any familiar face around me to talk to.

I wasn’t 100 percent confident with flying the whole time, but I still applied all these tips I shared with you today which made the whole experience much more enjoyable.

Fear is okay. As I said in the introduction, it’s there to keep us safe.

But don’t let it keep you small and limit how you live your life.

10. Allow yourself to be afraid, but don’t let your fear stop you

“Bran thought about it. ‘Can a man still be brave if he’s afraid?’
‘That is the only time a man can be brave,’ his father told him.”
― George R.R. Martin

It’s not true that you need to be fearless in order to take action. You’re human. It’s okay to be afraid of whatever you’re afraid of.
You get to decide what action you are going to take whether you feel scared or not.

Ready for a truth bomb? While you’re afraid of flying, you’ll never feel 100 percent ready and comfortable getting on a plane.

But the thing is, you can let that fear stop you, just like it stopped me for years.

Or you can allow yourself to be afraid and still hop on a plane and not let your fear limit you.

At the end of the day, it’s a choice.

What are you going to choose?

Oh and, by the way, I forgot to mention that I cried during my first flight. It was ridiculously scary for me so that was a way my body dealt with it.

I mean, it wasn’t a full-on ugly cry, but let’s just say that I was glad I booked a window seat so that I could just turn my head towards the window and not draw any attention with tears coming down my cheeks.

The reason I’m sharing with you my unfiltered experience is to show you that a lot of people deal with the same fear you feel.

But you can avoid facing your fear of flying because it’s uncomfortable, scary, terrifying, or you can, in the words of Susan Jeffers, feel the fear and do it anyway.

I hope you’ll choose growth.

Read next:

How to Take Care of Your Mental Health While Traveling

How to Choose Your Thoughts and Master Your Mind

If you found this post useful, share it on social media or share it with your friends, maybe one of them is struggling with the fear of flying, you never know. It’s not something that often comes up in conversations.

Until the next time,

Ivana

aerophobia aviophobia fear of flying overcoming fear of flying