Do you feel like you’re living under constant pressure to do more, achieve more, and be more? If you crave a calm life and a clear mind, this post is for you.
We explore different ways to reduce the mental clutter and stress of our never-ending to-do lists. I also offer questions for reflection to help you understand where the pressure is coming from and how you can start creating a more enjoyable life.
Prefer audio? Listen to this blog post on my podcast, The La Ivana Podcast (available on all podcast platforms & my YouTube channel).
1) living under constant pressure to do more, achieve more, have more, and be more
“I promise you nothing is as chaotic as it seems. Nothing is worth diminishing your health. Nothing is worth poisoning yourself into stress, anxiety, and fear.”
― Steve Maraboli
Everywhere I look I see the ultimate guides to the ultimate winter arc before 2025 or how to glow up before 2025. This marketing that pushes us to do more because we have less than two months left before the new year. So we need to go “all in” and make sure we start the new year on the right foot.
It got me thinking, can we all, as a collective, just chill out for a moment?
Where are we rushing?
Why do we need to cram all our goals into one year or into a 30-day challenge?
Don’t get me wrong, I value personal growth a lot. I started my self-development YouTube channel back in 2017 which grew into a blog (yay! You’re reading it!) and then a podcast and then I got certified as a life coach in 2020… But still, I’m thinking to myself – let’s ease down with the pressure.
Living under constant pressure to always do more. Experiencing guilt, shame, and blame when you take a step back and decide to slow down.
Because people wear “business” as a badge of honor.
“Good for you for always doing something!”
“Good for you for being productive!”
“It’s impressive how you’re always keeping yourself busy!”
There’s this advice in the self-help industry on how to ensure you’re making the most out of your time that encourages listening to a podcast or an audiobook while doing chores.
It seems like cooking or folding your laundry or even walking or driving in a car is not productive enough. You need to make sure you’re also learning. You must fill all 24 hours with something. Multitasking is admirable.
And I followed that advice for a long time, but now my response to that is – can it ever be silent?
Can we allow ourselves to enjoy a few peaceful and quiet moments in our day?
Oftentimes the best thing you can do is move away from all the noise. Not add more noise into your life.
How do you feel when you have a moment of stillness? A moment of silence.
Why do we feel the pressure to fill blank spaces in our calendars?
Questions for reflection:
Do you feel mentally healthy?
Does your mind feel clear? – Not distracted and cluttered with other people’s expectations, gossip, latest news, shoulds…
Do you feel physically healthy?
Do you feel pressured by the people around you? – To do things faster or to go at their pace.
How is your environment affecting you? – Your environment consists of the people you spend most of your time with, your physical space, as well as your online environment (what you surround yourself with online).
Do you consume content that makes you feel like you’re never enough?
Who in your life is adding to that pressure? – Yes, even online.
It’s wild how the pressure can add up from many different directions.
Read more:
8 Things to Do When You Don’t Feel Good Enough
2) overcomplicating and overthinking due to having too many options
You would think that having more options is going to make our life easier, but just look at how much time we spend thinking about what to wear, what perfume to use, what to eat, or what movie to watch.
We make around 30,000 decisions every single day. Including what task to do first, what to say, or when to start getting ready.
We have so many options that it creates overwhelm.
What if we cut our options in half?
Think about where you are overcomplicating or overthinking.
Cut your to-do list in half. We waste so much time thinking about what to do first out of 20 tasks.
Try focusing on 1-3 main things you actually want to get done. 1-3 tasks that will make the biggest difference.
Having a million things to do and feeling like you don’t have enough time adds to living under constant pressure.
Simplify.
Cut your follower list or your subscriptions in half. Declutter your environment to have a clearer mind. A clearer view of things.
See how you feel when you stop putting as much pressure on yourself.
Read more:
6 Habits That Will Make Your Life Easier // Simplify Your Life
9 Ways Minimalism Changed My Life For The Better
3) What are we normalizing?
“Just when you feel you have no time to relax, know that this is the moment you most need to make time to relax.”
― Matt Haig
Is it just your normal to be under pressure and exhausted every day?
Just because it’s common to be frustrated and depleted, doesn’t mean that it’s normal. Doesn’t mean it’s something we should accept and let it be.
We, as a collective, have normalized spreading ourselves too thin.
You get a pat on the back when you say you’ve been hustling or working non-stop.
If you say you got a massage, the response might be “Oh, lucky you. I wish I had the time.”
We might judge or make people wrong for prioritizing self-care or a slower life. Calling a slower life “boring.”
I saw a post of a woman who shared how she worked on TV for 10 years and burnt out. Then she worked for herself for 10 years and burnt out again. Now she works at a bookstore and she has never been happier.
She shared how someone came into the bookstore, recognized her from TV, and said to her “You were on TV and now you’re just a bookseller? What happened?”
Imagine hearing that after experiencing multiple burnouts and finally feeling better about your choices.
Despite comments like those, you need to prioritize your mental health and well-being above other people’s opinions.
Questions for reflection:
What are you choosing out of fear of being judged?
What do you want to do but feel afraid of other people’s reactions?
Look at your mental and physical health. What change do you need to make in your life having your health in mind?
What feels correct for you? – Know that it doesn’t need to make sense to anyone else.
Your decisions about your life are no one else’s business. Your life is your responsibility.
What are you choosing?
Read more:
8 Tips To Say No Without Feeling Guilty And Selfish
Share this blog post with someone who needs to read it and if this is an area of your life you want to work on and improve, I invite you to book a session with me.
Until the next time,
Ivana
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