There’s this misconception that confident people don’t have fears and limiting beliefs. We tend to think how confident people don’t care about what others might think. They just follow their goals and never feel afraid of judgment or rejection.
But confidence is not about never being afraid. True confidence is when you feel scared, you’re not 100% ready, but you take action anyway.
Today, I’m sharing with you 3 things confident people don’t do and how they approach fears and disempowering beliefs.
Ready to build your confidence and start showing up in spite of fears?
Let’s dive in.
1. Confident people don’t let fear stop them from going after what they want.
“Because so often when we say we’re unqualified for something, what we’re really saying is that we’re too scared to try it, not that we can’t do it.”
― Jen Sincero
Does this mean that confident people don’t feel fear? No. Of course, they do.
Everyone feels afraid of something at some point. Fear of failure, fear of being judged, fear of being rejected… That’s completely normal.
But what confident people do differently is that they feel the fear and they’re fine with it. They know that fear is going to come up as they grow and do bigger things, but that fear doesn’t stop them from taking action and going after their goals.
Whereas people who are insecure and not as confident are easily held back by their fears.
They start thinking ‘’what if I fail/what if I get rejected’’, and they get into the analysis-paralysis state and avoid taking action at all costs.
They are not going to go after their goals because all the what-if worst-case scenarios are keeping them stuck.
What I want you to realize is that fear is completely normal. Everyone experiences it.
However, if you want to achieve your goals and live your best life, you have to, as that quote says, ‘’feel the fear and do it anyway.’’
Instead of letting your fear control your whole life, take control of your fear.
Say to yourself that it’s okay that you’re afraid because you’re going outside of your comfort zone. You’re doing something for yourself that you’ve never done before.
And it’s okay that you’re scared. But you want to improve your life and live it to the fullest potential. Which is why you have to show up. You have to go after your dreams.
And then start taking action and build your confidence along the way.
Free download:
111 Powerful Affirmations to Build Confidence and Change Your Life
2. Confident people don’t waste their time on other people’s opinions.
“Do your thing and don’t care if they like it.”
― Tina Fey
Again, this doesn’t mean that confident people don’t care about what other people think.
To a certain degree, we all care about what other people might think about us.
We all care about how we present ourselves. Of course, we want to look our best in front of other people. We want to be accepted. That’s normal.
But again, the difference is that confident people don’t focus on people who might judge them. They don’t focus on people who don’t support them.
They know that they are not going to be liked by everyone. And they’re fine with that. Other people’s opinions don’t stop them from taking action.
On the other hand, for insecure people, what oftentimes can happen is that they think that someone else might judge them which stops them from taking action. Other people’s opinions stop them from doing what they want and being who they are.
Confident people are still aware that there are going to be people who are not going to like them, but that doesn’t hold them back.
Therefore, what I want to encourage you to do is to accept that everyone has an opinion. Everyone has an opinion about everything.
And if you try to please everyone, you will end up disappointing yourself and pleasing no one, so focus on yourself.
Focus on how you can make yourself feel proud rather than how to make everyone else like you.
Make sure that when you go to bed tonight that you are so content with what you did today and that you feel proud of yourself.
Make sure that what you’re doing is aligned with your values, goals, and desires.
Read next:
Life-Coaching Tools for Building Confidence
3. They don’t let their beliefs limit them.
Belief is a thought that you repeated to yourself so many times that you started believing it.
It’s not a fact, which means that your beliefs can change.
Confident people know that their negative beliefs are not facts that should hold them back.
Everyone has certain limiting beliefs.
But the question is – are you going to let those limiting beliefs stop you from taking action? Or are you going to deal with those beliefs, knowing that they’re not facts and that they are only there to protect you?
For instance, let’s say that you have a limiting belief that you’re not good enough to get a promotion at your job.
Confident people are not going to let that belief stop them. They are not going to see that belief as a fact, because they know that that belief is there to keep them safe.
When you think that you are not good enough for something, you are going to stay where you are. And where you are is where you are safe.
On the other hand, when you look at that limiting belief as what it is – just a thought that you convinced yourself to be true, then you can replace it with another thought. A more beneficial thought.
You can say to yourself that even though maybe you won’t get that promotion, you can still apply. You can still prepare. And, you can still show up and do your part.
So even though you have that limiting belief, you’re not going to let it control your life or limit your potential because you can achieve so much more. And you deserve to at least give yourself the opportunity to succeed.
And that’s the thing, confident people are going to still apply for that promotion because they know that on the other side of that limiting belief is opportunity.
On the other side of the fear that they might get rejected is faith that they might get accepted. The only fact is that the actual event hasn’t even happened yet.
Look at confidence as a muscle. You will build it by doing things that are outside of your comfort zone. You will increase your confidence by pushing your limits and replacing those negative beliefs with encouraging ones.
So don’t let your beliefs limit you and instead, show up, do your part and have faith that everything is going to turn out okay.
And even if it doesn’t turn out the way you want it to, you’re still going to be fine.
You’re still going to be proud of yourself because you have done everything in your power. And that’s the most important thing when you’re dealing with fear, limiting beliefs, and worrying about what other people might think. Those things are outside of your control.
What you need to do is to focus on things you can control. Focus on the way that you show up. Focus on your actions, your mindset, and your words.
At the end of the day, that’s the only thing that you can control. You can’t control if someone else is going to like you and it’s not your job to control that.
Your job is to make sure that you like yourself.
Read next:
3 Toxic Mindsets that Sabotage Your Success
3 Ways to Overcome Your Limiting Beliefs
Until the next time,
Ivana
building confidence confidence limiting beliefs self-confidence
I 100% agree with not caring about what other people think. I’ve found that in reality that can be difficult at least in my case, but gradually trying to overcome that has absolutely been rewarding. Thanks for sharing!
Confidence is so key to success, and all three of the things you shared are so spot on! Thanks for sharing 🙂
Such a great article!
Yes, you are absolutely right! We often think that brave and confident people don’ have fears, but to be truly brave means to be scared of something and still face it.
This was very helpful, thank you! For someone who lacks confidence, this blog really spoke to me. I can’t wait to try these tips! xx