Oh, the number of times I googled how to get out of a rut just to find a list of things I could try out for a day and then AFTER I had a day when I cooked Mexican food, tried out new makeup look, took a different route to the city… Everything was the same.
I was still sitting at my desk wondering what was wrong with my life and blaming the city and everything else for the reason I was stuck at some perpetual point in my life. But…
The city was not a problem, neither were the people. I had to change MYSELF in order to change my life. So how to change that? How to get out of a rut and make a lasting change in your life?
1. What specific area of your life is in a rut?
To find out how to get out of a rut, first, you have to realize what’s causing the problem. Are you sick of the way you spend your time each day? Are you getting bored with your appearance? Your home? The fact that you’re always eating basically the same food?
At first, you might want to say, ”Ugh, everything! Every area of my life is in a rut and I hate it!”
But I encourage you to think about what specifically made you think that your life is in a rut. Yout job? The lack of excitement outside of work? What is it?
Write it down so that you have a clear awareness of what’s actually bothering you.
2. Being in a rut is easy.
Before you change anything, you have to realize that being in a rut is the easiest thing. A lot of times we keep things the way they are because we are used to them and it’s the easiest way.
So you need to ask yourself are you willing to experience the short-term discomfort of doing something new for long-term pleasure?
Write down what are you gaining from staying in a rut. It might be that things are familiar where you currently are. You’re comfortable where you are. But what else? What else kept you stuck in a rut for a while?
3. What’s your brain saying?
Now write what are you missing when you stay in a rut. New experiences? New people? The opportunity to grow? Living your life to the fullest?
This will help you find out why getting out of a rut is important for you and what are you willing to sacrifice to change something.
At first, when you’re starting to change something from its core, it’s going to be a bit difficult. There’s going to be resistance because you’re used to doing certain things the same way and now you want to change.
Your brain is going to be like, ”Whaaat?? Let’s go back to where we were. We were safe there!”
But know that that’s just a part of your brain called the primitive brain and it wants to keep you safe.
The other part of your brain called the prefrontal cortex is evolved human part that has a desire for more.
That’s why sometimes you’ll feel like you’re wrestling yourself. You want to get out of a rut and stay comfortable at the same time.
Ask yourself what are you choosing? Are you choosing comfort or growth?
Then make sure you love your choice.
4. What does getting out of a rut look like for you?
It’s difficult to change much when you don’t know what you want your life to look like. So ask yourself what does getting out of a rut mean to you?
What does getting out of a rut look like? How would your life be different?
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5. What can you do today to get out of a rut?
All the questions I shared with you in today’s post won’t mean anything unless you apply what you learned. Now that you know what’s the problem, what do you want to change, and what you want your life to look like – it’s time to take action.
Brainstorm some action steps you can do today and this week and put them in your calendar or planner.
It can look something like this:
– networking event on Friday 5 p. m.
– go on a morning walk tomorrow at 7 a. m.
– apply for promotion on Thursday
– hire a life coach to help me make a long-term change in my life
– start dating again
6. Hold yourself accountable.
I know, you’re so excited to make a change right now and start with a clean slate tomorrow (or in 5 minutes).
But it’s important to stay consistent. Whatever goal you have, if you take action only a few times a month or fall off track after a week, you’ll be right back where you started.
If you love habit trackers, use them for this, too.
If you love having external accountability, join some Facebook groups with a similar goal or hire a coach.
Set yourself up for success right from the beginning instead of waiting for obstacles to show up and then giving up because you don’t know how to deal with them.
Read next:
5 Reasons to Hire a Life Coach
How to Overcome Obstacles
7. Do it for yourself.
Do it because this life is not a free trial. Let go of the need to prove yourself to others and experience your life for yourself.
What do YOU want? What do you want your life to FEEL like?
It’s all well and good to live a life that looks happy and successful on the outside. But if you’re not fulfilled on the inside – something needs to change.
So, what is it, reader? What are you committed to change in order to live a life that FEELS good?
Until the next time,
Ivana
Oh man – it is so difficult to get out of a rut sometimes. I know for me, this time in a pandemic has hurt my mental health and so many others. It is good to have simple reminders like this post to refer back to when you are down in the dumps. Thanks for sharing!