How to be alone and enjoy it?
We find ourselves constantly looking for a company, for some familiar face so that we don’t feel alone. But what’s so bad about being alone? Do we not know how amazing we are and therefore we try to find other people who would make us feel good.
Today, I’m sharing with you my advice on how to be alone and enjoy it. You might want to stick around, since this lesson you’ll carry your whole life. Because the relationship you have with yourself is the one that will last your whole life.
“Life is too short to waste any amount of time wondering what other people think about you. In the first place, if they had better things going on in their lives, they wouldn’t have the time to sit around and talk about you. What’s important to me is not others’ opinions of me, but what’s important to me is my opinion of myself.”
―
1. Get to know yourself.
If you want to learn how to be alone and enjoy it, you have to get to know yourself first. It’s the same process you had at the beginning of every relationship; you have to get to know the person first.
So what’s your story? What do you like about yourself? What are your small victories and the biggest successes? And what are the mistakes that have taught you the most valuable lessons?
Be honest with yourself and journal what comes to mind. What are you good at? What makes you unique? After all these answers you’ll realize that you’re actually not so bad.
You can also learn about yourself through some new experiences and new conversations. Don’t be afraid to get outside of your comfort zone for this one. You’re not going to learn about yourself in your familiar bedroom. When you put yourself out there and experience new situations, you’ll learn what drives you, what you’re afraid of, and what truly matters to you.
Read next:
What to Do When You Can’t Find Yourself?
50 Self-Discovery Journal Prompts to Up-Level Your Life
2. Take yourself out on a date.
Dress up like you’re going out on a date with the hottest person you know and get a cup of coffee at your favorite coffee place. Or go to the movies by yourself. Or take a one-day solo trip to some city near you and take pictures of everything.
You can even stay at home, make the most delicious dinner, again, like you’re having dinner with the hottest person you know, have a glass of red, and celebrate how amazing you are.
Don’t wait for other people to make you feel special and loved – start with yourself.
For some extra inspiration, here is the interview I had with Marisa Vogiatzi on The La Ivana Podcast where she shared all about how solo travel helped her build her confidence and self-esteem. Pretty amazing, ha?
Want some ideas for what to do on your own? Read next:
20+ Awesome Things to Do When You’re Single
SAVE FOR LATER 🙂
3. Challenge yourself.
Take the time you have for yourself to try out something you always wanted but no one wanted to join you. Yoga class? Gym? Language class? You know what it is.
Realize that you can do it by yourself and do it. Don’t be the one holding yourself back. Also, you can start researching things that interest you, no one is going to judge you.
In my case, at one point in January years ago, I had a lot of time for myself, so I started this blog. Not a bad idea, right? A year after I started it, it became my full-time job. If you’re interested in how I became a full-time blogger in one year, I wrote all about it in this post.
You can also start a new habit. Maybe you want to start going to the beach first thing in the morning or make food inspired by Italian cuisine.
Think of something you’ve always wanted to accomplish and go for it.
Read next:
3 Toxic Mindsets that Sabotage Your Success
How to Push Yourself Outside of Your Comfort Zone Even When You’re Terrified
FREE DOWNLOAD: 111 Empowering Affirmations for Confidence and Motivation
4. Love and respect yourself no matter what.
“The most terrifying thing is to accept oneself completely.”
―
When was the last time you said to yourself ”I love you. You’re doing amazing!” We don’t do that very often. We don’t show love and respect to ourselves as much as we deserve.
We’re quick to judge our bodies, shame ourselves for what we’ve done years ago, and feel guilty for our own emotions.
Truth is, when we love ourselves, we love others as well. We are not judging other people. We are aware that we’re all human beings trying to live our best lives. Trying to be happy.
Don’t be too hard on yourself. Recognize what you’ve accomplished in your life. Be proud of yourself. Love yourself and be open to receiving love from others. Validate your emotions instead of trying to run away from them.
At the end of the day, you’ll always have yourself. Be there for yourself like you would be for your best friend. Always make yourself a priority. Nourish your body with quality food. Nourish your mind and soul with positive thoughts and be grateful for who you are. Because you are incredible and worthy of love and happiness.
JOURNALING BUNDLE
If you need more support with feeling empowered and creating the best version of yourself, check out my journaling bundle with journaling workshops for creating the next level you and building confidence. It’s the perfect way to continue your self-development journey after reading this post.
>> get the Journaling Bundle here (workshops and eBook included)
Until the next time,
Ivana
Enjoy says
I have always been around ppl. Like my jobs and my kids. Now that they all have there life. I really enjoy time by my self. The only issue is my family they some how think am lonely.. specially my son and my husband.. my husband has always been away first a marine and now over the road driver so am use to it. I find things to do. But they just call all the time to tell me about stuff I should do. By the way am retired now. I just wish they would let me be.. I worked 40 years raised a family. Now I just want to do me. Time .. even if it just sitting in my backyard watching the birds taken in life. I have done road trip cross country, mountains , waterfalls. California.. why do I have learn anything or do something everyday.. any advise ? Ty
Michal B.L. says
Heck yeah! I used to be so scared of my own presence. I would feel awkward and out of place when I was a alone in a crowd. I worried too much what people would say or think. But single life taught me how to be comfortable with myself, in my own company and skin. To stop worrying and caring what people think and just love my life. Life is so much better now. ❤️😍
Alison says
My husband of 24 years passed away 2 months ago and in the last few years spent a lot of time looking after him happily. Now I’m looking at how I start again and this has given me a great starting point. Thanks